maybe its beck. maybe its me. maybe its finishing a degree. maybe its been a year. maybe its this robe i'm wearing and the weather refusing to brighten. maybe its the paint i was compelled to buy. the portrait i needed to start. maybe its the season. maybe its all the plans i'm making. all the things i'll soon be leaving. maybe i broke down a little. maybe i'm still breaking down. maybe not. maybe this is how life will feel from now on. maybe i will always wonder whether i am happy. maybe i will always be chasing happiness even when i think i have it now.


uncertain feet. uncertain ground.