little room
i love my room here. i absolutely adore it. i come home from class and i open my door and immediately i feel at home. there's a certain smell to my room and a comfy feel that makes coming home that much nicer. i never much cared about my room in toronto. it never felt like mine. it was my parent's house, something my father drilled into my head. and probably partly because of this drilling, it never felt like mine. it was their place that i occupied occasionally... wanted to get out of more often than not. but here... here feels like me. my room in toronto was pretty bare, i rarely spent time in it and rarely cared about what it looked like. but here... my room is me. it is filled with little pieces of me that i brought and is continuing to be filled with pieces of what im becoming (that makes me sound like im turning into a butterfly or a platypus or something... lol). but there was a definite need to make this generic room my own... it was the first impulse i had when i walked in here in august... and it is a continuing one. it started as a need to feel secure in a situation that made me insecure at first. and now it is continuing as a way for me to create something... some sort of womb, have you... that i can crawl into and like. and that other people can walk into and feel like they can know me a bit better from just having been here.

this was a long ass post on my room. just incase you didn't notice.