i don't know what is worse
and i can't tell what is the best

i am sick of judging my days as good or bad based on how much homework i get done.

yesterday i got some time to breathe. i sat on my sun-warmed porch in my pjs. i felt the freckles on my face emerging. i rolled up the legs on my pants to feel the spring sun touch my skin. a relationship i missed. that wasn't enough. i rolled my sleeves up. i bared my stomach. i wish i could have stripped down and just sat there. not to tan. just to be caressed. it just felt nice. right to my core. i was warm. and i wasn't sad or worried or even thinking much. my skin misses summer more than any other part of me i think.