ladyflash
maybe now i can let it go? maybe its better if he is seeing this girl. then i can just let it go. take whatever it was out of the limbo i have suspended it in. and drop it. just drop it. it really is probably maybe better that way.

but look, i can still suspend it. ready? but what if they aren't actually seeing each other? or what if they end it by the time i get back?

see how i did that? i can keep some sort of possibility out there. in limbo.

dammit. why can't i just drop it. and then maybe if he hasn't dropped it, i can pick it back up later. just let me drop it for now. please. i'm getting tired of this magic trick.

kind of hoped you wouldn't blame me
i can't wake up every day and find the same me
you can scream but i'll just dream
how you might disappear
all i know is its never clear
i can't hold you near
you just are not here
- the lemonheads, "hannah & gabi"