there are two sides to every story.
the other thing i took from the movies was the idea that being in a relationship is the most selfish thing you can do. it truly is. it explains to me so perfectly why i am a "serial monogamist." i am so selfish. i can't bear to not be the object of someone's interest, affections... someone's distraction. being with someone... sharing yourself... it is entirely selfish. for me. right now. i don't know whether i should feel guilty about this or not.

it's not as if i don't care about the person i'm with. i do. i love getting to know someone... getting to probe them... getting in their heads... surprising them with what i find. i love it. but i can also see this as a selfish act. something i do for me.

i wonder what i'm trying to say.