i'd like to see you on your back.
so we will take it slow.
and i will write like this for now.
sentence by sentence.
line by line.

i will slowly pretend i didn't fall face first.
i'm sure you will know.
i will slowly pretend i don't know.

you intimidate me.
you scare me.
you excite me.
you made me a mix cd. track 13 emf - unbelievable.
i don't want to disappoint you.
i want you to find in me the things you are expecting.

i want to make this different.
i don't know how.
but i guess that is a compliment.
i took it as one when you said it to me.

i need to sleep.
what i really need...
is to concentrate on my last days of school.
sometimes school feels so entirely irrelevant.